« Prophet Mohamed or……. | Main | A Face Only A Mother Could Love…… »
February 12, 2006
Ariel Sharon replaced by squash…..
Tel Aviv (AP) - Daniel Benolo, Chair of the Knesset House Committee has announced that Israeli Prime Minister, Ariel Sharon, has been replaced by an acorn squash after a large portion of his colon was recently removed during emergency surgery.
Sharon remains in a deep coma since suffering a massive stroke in early January.
Benolo went on to comment, “There was growing unrest within the Knesset with questions being raised as to the best course of action and who should lead it. But obviously, it is difficult under circumstances such as these to pick one man over another. The solution became suddenly clear, make the acorn squash prime minister until the situation resolves itself.”
He explained further, “At this point, they are both essentially vegetables. Both essentially the same shape. Mr. Sharon is much larger, but Mr. Acorn (pr: Ahh-korn) has better color.
The unexpected development is how well Mr. Acorn is doing with his appointment. He seems to have a sound, quiet resolve. He never argues. This alone has improved efficiencies in the Knesset by over 90% as the vast majority of our time is spent arguing and fighting.
But perhaps the most important development has been the improvement in the Middle East peace process as anti-Israeli violence seems to have come to a stop. We’ve heard reports that a spokesperson from Hezbollah has stated that they cannot fight a nation lead by a side dish, because if they won they would become a laughing stock. The military equivalent of boasting of a sexual conquest with a retarded cousin. They are praying for a speedy recovery by Mr. Sharon. If this keeps up though the year, it is possible that the acorn squash could win the Nobel Peace prize.”
Inside sources have reported that if the acorn squash continues to do well, that the Knesset is considering appointing a bowl of couscous as foreign secretary and a lamb kebab as minister of defense. Mr. Benolo declined comment on this but added, “If the lamb kebab is spicy, then you’ll know it’s a Likud kebab.”
We join Mr. Benolo in wishing Mr. Sharon a speedy and complete recovery.
~ AP
Posted by Anonymous Pundit at February 12, 2006 12:42 PM